I want to first thank my dear friend Alyson for being the only commenter on my blog for quite some time - thanks! (hey, how do you like being mentioned in both my and Sarah's blog?)
My struggle = using the word "hate"
So, back in the day, the word hate was almost like using the f-word. It was very taboo and we (civilized America) were trying to "overcome the oppression" of the word hate. Here's the thing, I like using it. I use it almost as a joke as if I can "hate" something as trivial as curry or how the Olive Garden always smells like old dish water. I mean, I say I hate something, but am I going to react on this hate? No. Am I going to commit a hate-crime? No. It's a funny word to me. I can tell that when I say it, it still sets people off and they look at me funny. Whatever. I feel the same way about the word "shut-up". I hate that phrase - lol.
Here's where all this is coming from......our house sits in the same direction of our lot. Our lot is long and narrow and so is our house. It fits nicely on the lot. Do I wish the lot was smaller? Yes. Do I wish it was a typical lot where the house faced the road? Probably. It doesn't make me crazy though, so I can deal with it just fine. Here's the kicker, we have a VERY long driveway to our house. It's so long, in fact, that we can't afford to pave it. It would be like a $15,000 project if we cemented it. Asphalt is another option but is still going to be very expensive. I digress.
If you've read Sarah's blog at all, you know about our issue with the potholes in the driveway caused by our irresponsible neighbors. Some people try to avoid these holes whereby driving on our lawn. It makes me crazy. The most notorious offender? The postal carrier!!!! This amazon of a woman deliberately drives on our grass. She has a chip on her shoulder the size of the mole on her upper lip. I don't know why she has such a vendetta against us. She is blatantly disrespectful to our property and makes no bones about it. Now, my lawn is not impeccable, but the large majority of the area that you see when you come to visit my home looks very nice. I always know that she's been to deliver a package to the house because I can see her tire tracks through the lawn. We've called the Post Office to ask her not to drive on the lawn, but this has caused her to do it even more. I'm sorta at the point that if I saw her do it, I would grab the closest steel rod and beat the living daylights out of her 1997 Nissian Altima - burgundy of course.
So, the other day we came home to find both sets of tire tracks going straight through the lawn. I was furious! I came inside and was telling my mom about it (she was keeping Celie so it was Monday). I'm actually getting angry just thinking about it. So I say out loud...."I hate that stupid woman!" Referring to her disrespect of my property. My mom looked at me in disgust and, as usual, tells me that I won't go to Heaven if I have hate in my heart. I laughed at her because I really don't have hate in my heart. When I think of the kind of person who has hate in their heart I think of Osama Bin Laden or that Heinz-Kerry woman or that real estate lady in NYC who left all that money to her cat or something. I mean, I don't want to kill this woman. Well..................
So today, I come home. We're changing Celie from a disgusting poopy diaper. Our phone rings and it's my mom. She begins reading me every single scripture in the Bible that talks about hate. Apparently she even called Sarah today and asked her if I still had hate in my heart. My loving wife apparently told her that I always do, it just rotates from person to person depending on the day. Finding all this out later, further explained why my mom ended our conversation with this phrase: "So you better ask the Lord to forgive you of having hate in your heart for the mail lady, OR WHOEVER ELSE YOU HATE DEPENDING ON WHAT DAY IT IS."
I don't want anything bad to happen to the mail lady except for maybe a new job where she doesn't have to interact with humans. I mean, I'd like to beat her up or at least destroy her car, but no "real" harm to her.
So the word "hate". What does it mean to you? Is it just an exaggerated version of dislike that you use to comically express a true disgust for something or does it conjure up a dark and horrible meaning for you that only the vilest of offenders could define? Either way, it's not a big deal to me.....I will probably continue to use it, mostly though to see how many "sermons" my mom will give me. I'll clearly have to stop using it once Celie is repeating what we say.
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6 comments:
ok, I hate cherries, green beans and poached eggs. I hate it when my kids are sick. I hate it when I get an unexpected bill. I hate certain songs in church :)I hate certain days at work, Monday through Friday to mention a few. I hate when people judge you for using a word when you really don't mean it in more than a passing phrase, like hate, or shut up , or stupid. I hate stupid people. HA! I agree there is HATRED in the world, and it is usually making headlines more than the good in this world, but I don't consider myself a hatER.
the word hate to me is just used as a more firm vision of dislike. Telling someone I really dislike something. Saying or writing "gravely dislike" takes a lot longer than "hate" so I use it. I don't have actual hatred in my heart for anyone or anything.... I think strong dislike is how 99% of people use the word. :)
This is the Matthew I've known for years. I laughed so hard I cried at this posting. Anyone who knows you knows this is just how you are. We all know that you would never intentionally hurt someone but you would have a very devious scheme mapped out in your head so that at any given time you could act on it. Remember...she's just the mail lady. Your mom calling you though is the most hilarious thing and completely cracked me up b/c I can see/hear her doing it. You should put a bunch of nails in your yard...that will stop her from driving through it. I don't think she makes enough at the post office to replace the tires on that 1997 Altima.
Keep up the hilarious stories and I promise to start commenting more!
You should bypass the Post Office and call the Post Master about your mail carrier. And, I do have to agree with Sarah, you do always hate someone, just depends on which day..:)hmm..harboring hatred? passive agressive? Maybe Miss Punkin is on the right track. Sounds like someone could use some anger management!
Okay Matthew I know that you don't have the actual "HATE" in your heart, and I know that it is just a word, I guess it's much easier to say than, I dis-like that person so much.The thing is I have given you several ideas to remendy the problem.I don't mind doing it myself but it is your property, and I don't care how many times you call the "Wewa" poastal office nothing will get done. So you have to take matters in your own hands, like putting up a tacky little fence for a little while or have her deliver to my house that has a drive way.So I just ask you if you are going to say I hate that person, just don't say it around me:) You know when you were litle and all the words I didn't like you to say and here are a few, (Lord forgive me,) hate,darn-it crap,fart, swear,the n word,this is just a few. But just remember you do have a daughter and they do repeat words they hear. Just one question, in all your growing up did you ever hear me(not your dad) say any slang words??? It's just the word HATE is so matter of fact and I am sorry you think it is not.
Sorry this is soooo long.Remember read this in the loving way I meant for it to be.
I LOVE YOU!!!!!!
Well, Matthew, if necessary, I can probably provide for you - your mom - and your entire blog community a very long list of the people who, on a rotating basis, fall victim to your hate on any given day. Just let me know if I can be of help! Tho, as you have assured me, I never fall onto that list!
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