It's been a few days since my last post....sorry. Work has been COMPLETELY INSANE!!!! Thus, no time to even think about blogging and then once I get home, I'm starving and want to hang out with Sarah and the flawless princess that is Celie.
So let me just give you an update on where we are as first-time parents. WE'VE CROSSED THE BRIDGE!!!! We're doing great and now, we're actually happy that we have a baby, LOL. I would have to say that we crossed the bridge on Friday. Celie is doing so well. She's taking excellent day-time naps now and sleeping like a dream at night. You see, this is where we were having some difficulties - the day-time nap.
Being the excellent mother that she is, Sarah thought that if Celie was crying, that meant something was wrong with her: she had a stomach ache, she was hungry, she was dirty, etc. Therefore, when Sarah would put her down for a nap, she would cry and Sarah would run to her rescue 10 minutes later. A couple of days she actually wound up holding her for 10 hours....driving her to the point of insanity. Once we realized that the baby hadn't read any of the books yet and that crying was their only form of communicating, we got tough. When Sarah would put her down, Celie would cry (and so would Sarah). After about 4 minutes, she was done and was sleeping away. Actually sleeping for about three hours. That was an adjustment and it's still hard for Sarah to hear her cry, but our lives are so much better now.
We decided to take a leap of faith and take Celie shopping on Saturday. We have a new outdoor mall at the beach that's super nice. We left the house at 11:30 and returned home at about 8:30. Celie did so well.....not a peep all day. She hung out, ate, napped all day. Her Grammy came along with us too (Sarah's mom). Sarah and I got massages which was soooo nice.
Saturday was also the day that we knew Celie was no longer "constipated". She was dressed to the nines in her little two-piece Strausburg outfit. Of course, this is the day she decides to blow out four diapers, one after the other after the other after the other after the other. Let me also mention that this mall is so new that the public restrooms aren't open yet - fun.
Sunday was equally as successful and so was Monday. We feel so much better about everything. Her new formula is working wonders as well...(we switched to the generic version of Enfamil Gentlease). She's burping so much easier. What a dream!!!!
There are things that people don't want to tell you when you're expecting or when you've had your baby. I think this is to protect your sanity. However, since I only care about my own sanity, I'm going to tell you:
- This is the hardest thing you're ever going to do - EVER!!
- You are not going to get any rest for the first month so get over yourself
- Every book has a different solution/remedy
- Everyone has had a different experience
- Every baby is different
- You must use your maternal/paternal instincts and determine what works best for YOUR baby - remember, it's your baby, not the author of the books baby (whose babies were apparently "perfect in every way")
- The solution that works for your baby may go against everything written in every book, but that's ok because you're the one dealing with your baby, not the authors
- You really need to have a support person/couple that you can call or talk to about what's going on in your world. These need to be people who have recently experienced child birth and they must be available to talk to you regardless of what time it is
- Your support person/couple should be people that are open minded and supportive of you who will listen to you complain for hours and answer an endless amount of questions that seem very complex but are really quite simple
- Don't be so stubborn or arrogant that you don't want to listen to people's suggestions - specifically those who have had children like your mother and mother-in-law. This doesn't mean that their suggestions are going to work for you, but at least listen.
- Do not feel like you are a bad parent if you let your baby cry - you aren't. Trust me, they're not in their crib crying, thinking to themselves "I cannot believe my parents have abandoned me at such a young age. This is clearly going to cause me to have issues with authority and I'll probably end up using drugs and becoming a prostitute."
- Don't get caught up in name brands - especially clothes. They grow so fast that they can only wear something a couple of times before it's too small.
- Love your spouse and support them, the mother or father. Both of you are going to be experiencing different emotions and you CANNOT compare them because they're so different, but remember that you love each other and your ultimate goal is the health and well-being of your baby.
- Give mom her own special time. She needs to get out even if it's just going to the grocery store. Being cooped up in a house all day for a month is hard.
- Find someone to keep your newborn for two hours so you can have a date-night.
- You're going to be so frustrated at times that you're going to think "why did we have a baby" or "I wish we would have waited" or "If I leave them in the yard for a while, will they get hurt" or "If I throw them out of the window will they stop crying" - these thoughts are normal and DO NOT think you're a bad parent when you have them because you aren't.
- If you have pets, continue to love them and when mom is holding baby, dad should be giving pet a lot of attention. It's a hard transition for them too.
- Don't buy a bunch of unnecessary crap. It just takes up space.
- Do buy a nice digital camera and video camera/camcorder
- Establish a plan as to how you're going to feed your baby. If you do half breast and half formula, it's ok. The La Leche League is not going to come into your house and take your baby from you and if you're not an exclusive breast feeder it doesn't mean that your baby is going to develop a chronic illness over night.
Some books that have helped us:
- The Baby Whisperer Solves All Your Problems
- Baby Wise - this book gets a lot of controversy over it's belief system. People either love it or hate it and you'll hear people say, "the authors aren't even in the medical profession" or "they don't even have kids" or "it's such a selfish standpoint" - I'm here to tell you, we heard all that about it, but no book has changed our lives more than this one. I'm not saying buy it or read it, but I am saying that it worked for us.
Have a great rest of the day!!!